slowing down
i was supposed to be slowing down my posting, but i find myself with a need to post a few things I need to get off my chest. feel free to ignore, as you probably will anyway, since you know none of the folks involved.
one of my teammates on one of the many projects here has had to take 4 days off from work this week. his grandmother died, and he's the only family member who is local. he and his wife, in addition to their baby, will be hosting 14(!) family members, and he simply will be swamped, not only with the funeral arrangements themselves, but with family.
this of course, got me thinking about my own family, and how i missed my grandmother's 88th birthday last thursday. and my great aunt is now on low-dose chemo for the next 4 weeks or so (a total of 6 wks) which is supposed to send her non-hodgkins lymphoma into remission (she's 87 or 88, too). and then there's my other grandmother, who turns 96 next month. long since off ALL of her meds, (almost a year, i think), she now doesn't know names of her kids. she can't see well, anyway, and so facial recognition is probably no help. my aunt went to see her and mentioned my mom by name... "is that one of my children?" she asked... as if my aunt was not related, either.
i want to see her one last time, but am reminded that I DID that already... I said goodbye. seeing her now will do nobody any good, as my mom keeps telling me. she's right, i know.
she's the glue that held that side of our family together. i doubt, with her passing, and that of the rest of her generation, that any family get-togethers will happen again. any visits with cousins or aunts and uncles will be in-passing and an afterthought, and tied with visits to specific cities, not reasons to go.
this is in stark contrast to the other side of the family, where my uncles have both passed away, along with (seemingly) any potential hinderance to relationship building between our families. we can now rally freely around our grandmother without any perceived hostility.
family is such an odd thing.